Thursday, August 4, 2011

Sita's incomplete Individuation Journey?

In Ramayana, Sita does not seem to have completed her individuation journey.

The most striking point for me is when Janaka tells Rama while giving away Sita that she will be a shadow to you, following through thick and thin, Sita herself also says this before they set out to the exile. From this ideal position of wanting to give everything, she comes to a point where she has no other go, read - her Ego is so assaulted that she wants to disappear into her origin, her mother, read - unconscious, again.

As I have been thinking about this myth for a couple of years now, one perspective that is emerging freshly to me is that, Rama has taken her as a partner to his Ego, the conscious Persona that has been groomed to be the Righteous King. This Persona is the one that marries Sita. His own journey with his Anima is still incomplete. In the life led by this Persona, he accepts difficulties, he accepts the 'weird' 'irrational' behaviours of the ununderstood Anima either in the form of Kaikeyi asking for his exile or Sita asking for the Magical Deer. His conscious and righteous response to this ununderstood, irrational demand of the Unconscious is how he stands and builds a Rama rajya. All his agonies, his love, his passion, his foolishness are all either undealt, kept personal or dealt with the help of Lakshmana. There are many a places where Lakshmana counsels him in his search for Sita.

Sita seems to have set out to give her full to Rama but unreceived in her entirety, she finally has to go into the greatest container of all, the Mother Earth herself. She hardly spends any time as the Queen.

To this day, mothers treat their daughters with a bit of extra pampering. They say, after all, she has to undergo difficulty at her in law's house.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011


It is that state in which we were born. But such is the natural  
default state that we know it not. Till we turn our back on it going  
behind knowledge which promises the 'knowing' of it. And we chase  
behind this illusive knowledge. Now our divinity has to work behind a  
screen to make us see it and accept it after facing it. For the  
individual's conscious mind, divinity is now an unknown force  
operating behind a screen of ignorance. It inspired fear am draws  
attention. Lo! Behold it now appears as your shadow the devil as a  
serpent operating unknown to you. The one whose power you fear and who  
you blame from putting you out of Eden and towards knowledge

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

What does the water in us hold?

A thought from the weekend intensive program...

In the waterside reflection, a point that came up was that water has the capacity to contain things. Like the water in a kalasha holds the mantra or a sankalpa or an intent.

If more than 60% of the body is water, this water is capable of holding a lot. Our thoughts, our intentions, our words must all be stored even in this water.
Slowing down, letting go and bringing fresh ideas probably refreshes us throughout, down to this water in our bodies.
If a host of negative thoughts are held in us as a thought pattern in this water of the body, and it forms 60% or more of our bodies, the amount of influence it must have on us must be tremendous!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Holding the Intent.

When we partner with the Universe, We need to learn to hold our intent.
What is holding our intent?  
I am consultant and I go to meet our client.  Our client faces a problem
and wants a solution.  As a consultant we offer our best thought out 
solution.  Our client wants to look at the solution offered and/or wants
to have discussion with their people.  
When I came out, I hold the intent that the client system get a solution
ever lasting one.  It need not necessarily from me but from any where
and from any one.  The intent is for solution not from me.
For every idea is a form of energy and the energy wants to manifest.
we hold our intent for the energy and also the energy form in its 
best manifestation. 
More on this subject, next.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Universe contains everything without any value judgement on them.  For example, what we consider good or bad, universe contains both without looking at it as good or bad. When we are partnering with universe, we need to know that how we handle this aspect in us.  If we look at this way, that every one unconsciously seek inner liberation. But the seeking itself is unconscious, we are not aware of it but we project it by liberating our nations.   Similarly, our inner manipulative and corruptedness of us is what we project on to the politicians and deal with it. It is true that the ruling mechanism was undemacratic and the politicians are corrupt.  But by just dealing it outside whatever we achieve will be there for a limited period.  If we are partnering with the universe, we need to deal with it within us also. Only then, we can treat such things judiciously with love and compassion.  Otherwise, we will deal it either aggressively or suppressively.  
PWU is also looking at the connectedness of us all, whether we are all good or bad.  Once we do our inner work, the inside gets projected outside also.    


Monday, January 31, 2011

Observing Oneself to keep up Consciousness

The challenge of being conscious all the time is when you are faced with factors that are your typical hooks for bringing down consciousness. Examples of these times are when you don't realize how your worst comes out when a baby is bawling and there is nothing you can do about it. The challenge in life is to be able to observe and be aware at these times, it is then that consciousness rises and you can hold it so.

While the first challenge in being conscious of oneself is when one is in a meditative state. There is no outside stimulation,  we have only  to observe the mind's chattering amidst outer calm. But unless one is taking sanyas, there is constraint in this. As long as our work keeps us in this society, we have to be able to do the same observing amidst the worst of our hooks/habits, be it coffee, tobacco or plain old laziness. If not finding your morning newspaper or poor traffic sense can make you want to use 4 lettered words and you only realize later how easily you can get affected, Imagine this a hundred fold and not as an event but an ongoing process, 24/7.  Most times we would not even realize that we get affected. We are caught up in a thought cycle which we don't even realize exists and which sucks out our energy.

Till finally survival becomes the goal and we are ground to death. An occasional spurt happens more as an accident and we are in the control of our thoughts not the thoughts on our control.

Positive and Negative Thought cycles

So what should one do? As I struggle to take care of a cranky baby, with loads of fear about how I will ever get back to being who I was before pregnancy, this question drives me mad. I become almost desperate not knowing what and how. As I discussed with friends and partners, I realize that what I have lost and what I miss is ‘consciousness’. The baby, - I have chosen to have wanting it in my life., aware that work will take a backseat for sometime.
Spending time with the baby – I have chosen with a desire for it. I have struggled hard and continue to struggle to be able to breastfeed her and in general take care of her.
Yet when it happens, I am unsettled, insecure, fearful. I seem not to be myself and am scared I will not be who I was. And then the cycle starts. I move from holding on to the baby to wanting to be away from it, get upset with people for nothing, expect the sky to be given to me on a platter for going through this – the works. As I put effort to observe myself, my behaviour,  my mind, my heart. I understand that the biggest thing that I had earlier and I don’t have now is Consciousness, well atleast some of it. Slowly, I relax simply because I am able to see this pattern in me. I see how everytime the baby cries my heartbeat soars, I see how in that moment that I am not able to settle the baby down I blame myself, I call myself incompetent, stuck up in the mind, not a good mother and so on. This only makes me feel even less confident and consequently makes the baby cry louder and there goes the cycle again and again. This realization, I hold on to as tightly as I would hold on to my breath if I were suffocating. I struggle to hold this in the mind and observe when it happens (the baby cries often enough for me to practice this anyway!). Finally I feel the grip of the cycle relax a bit. With a little bit of struggle, I slowly notice more and more in the baby, environment around me and most importantly my own mind.

At this moment I believe I am being more conscious as more of me seems to be freely engaging with the world around me. At some point it hits me that the real challenge is to live this consciousness everyday, all the time. It may be a fact that I am unable to do the things I used to do earlier to stay conscious like meditate, dialogue, read up, etc. But it is possible to do every small thing with consciousness - fully aware of what is happening in me when I do it and knowing that I am doing it because I choose to do it and thus love every small bit of it.

Looking back at the process, I see that The progression has been from noticing the behaviour, observing the mind, sensing the movement of energy in me from one feeling to another, till the point where the consciousness has slowly emerged and insights start coming. On the other hand, if I had not figured out that it was Consciousness that I was missing, I might have resented the baby for not giving me time,  I would have complained to everybody who listened that I don’t have any time for myself (and then when people got bored listening to me, I probably would have resented people for not listening to me!) and so on, making my life and everybody’s life miserable. I would thus go away further and further from my purpose.